Good Black Men are indeed all around us.  We pass them on the streets, in the malls, and at work.  Most we can't see because we don't know what a good man really looks like.  He usually isn't flashy enough or rich enough to turn our heads.  He might not wear a suit or push a Lexus.  He might not have a body like Tyson with a Denzel face.  But, as you mature, you (should) realize it's better to find someone who's got your back rather than someone who turns your head.

A good black man doesn't agree wholeheartedly with everything you say He doesn't just tell you what you want to hear and do the opposite.  He doesn't declare how sensitive, sweet, caring, sincere, etc. he is (he
won't have to because it shows).  He has his own opinions and yours may clash, but he doesn't have to degrade you to prove he's right.  He even admits at times to being wrong, especially if you are willing to do the same.  A good black man is not going to meet every item on your checklist.  He is human with frailties and faults mixed in with all of his wonderful, strong attributes.  He needs your love and respect.  He needs to feel that you don't live to catch him doing something wrong so you can declare, "Aha! I knew you were a dog!"

A good black man isn't insecure about his woman having great achievements.  In fact, he is her number one supporter and becomes disappointed with her when she begins to lose herself, especially for the sake of not hurting his feelings, or only wanting to make him happy.  His happiness comes with seeing her excel in her dreams and accomplishing her goals.  For as she excels and is exalted, a good woman will bring her good man right along with her.  A good black man doesn't necessarily give you a huge birthday or Valentine's gift.  He shows his love in the ways that are comfortable to him.  Don't judge him by TV standards.  No one is really living a fairy tale.  You'll miss out on your own fairy tale by buying into the myth that our men are no good.  It's just not true!  A good black man is a man of his word.  He says what he means and means what he says.  His word is his bond. He never leaves you wondering if he is going to call or show up - he is dependable. A good black man has a love and a heart for God.  As his relationship and love with and for God grows so will his relationship and love with and for you grow... Our beautiful black men we salute you, appreciate you and thank you for whom you are and all you've done.

Pass this along to some of the Good Black Men you know and a few women that need to read it ... So that they can recognize a good black man.

Rance Pettibone, Sr.